The monster under the bonnet

The "Skoda"

It is called the NCTS.  The National Car Testing Service and its reputation has been compared to that of the “Registry” in the US only with someone like a Joe Biden in charge.



Just to set the record straight I include Joe’s name into anything that I consider completely useless or incompetent.  God bless America, we can sure pick em and we (you not me) sure did in November … aaaaaaaaaaaaaaggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!

The NCTS has been in operation in Ireland for twelve years now so most are used to having it done and most accept it as something that Ireland’s car owners are legally obliged to do and for good reason.  But let’s face it; it’s a little bit like an American getting a notice to report to your local IRS office.  We don’t relish the thought and we certainly don’t want to have to do it any more than is necessary.

We have been preparing for this fucking test since we got back to “sunny” Ireland …by the by… the weather report this morning “a bit of a freeze in the early hours, cloudy with rain developing in the afternoon” or maybe that was the report from yesterday or the forecast for tomorrow.  Oh ya this is about the NCTS not the weather.

With over 60 checks carried out during the test it’s hard to deny that the NCTS is a thorough means of picking up any potentially dangerous faults such as bad breaks, defective steering or potatoes growing in the boot.  Does the extreme testing cross the line into “Biden” madness?  What does a full body scan performed on tall hot bodied red headed 26 year olds have to do with your car.  Well it would if I was in charge.

We have about four hours before the test and I am preparing what may be my last meal in the free world.  I just feel that if the car doesn’t pass, we will be locked up in the boot (trunk) and will be taken away never to be heard from again.

Speaking of boots.  I did bring my cowboy boots with me (two pair) and was going to wear my cowboy hat and boots to the test and was told in no uncertain terms “what are you fucking crazy…  they would reject the car as soon as you walked in the door and send it back to the Czech Republic on the next boat….with your fat  American arse in the boot”…

I have never been and I understand that the food is better over there.

…to be continued.

I hope to post again before Christmas…if not Happy Christmas!

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